Still Dreaming of You
by Dragon Scales 13
Summary: A RikkuTidus fic. Rating may go up, but it should be safe for now. Rikku's POV. First FFX fanfic! Second oneshot if PG for mentioning a lot of sad circumastances...
1. Still Dreaming of You

~~Still Dreaming of You~~  
  
~Alright, this is a Rikku/Tidus fanfiction, so if you don't like it, get lost. ^__^ This has some minor Yuna bashing, and from Rikku's POV. After the adventure of FFX. So please, review and enjoy!~  
  
~~Still Dreaming of You: Chapter 1: Understanding Rikku:~~  
  
I'm watched the rain beat down on the windowpane, leaning on the windowsill, mind anywhere but in my room. Sighing, my mind turns to one subject I don't want to bring up, not even in the privacy of my brain: The Pilgrimage.  
  
It's been almost 2 years since he left. Almost two years since Yuna stopped being a summoner, almost two years since the Calm. Wow, much has happened since then.  
  
Wakka and Lulu getting married, Yuna taking care of Spira, Kimahri returning to the mountains, Auron returning to the Farplane at last.  
  
And little, hyperactive Rikku?  
  
Still the same.  
  
Still emotional, Still hyper, Still cheery, Still air-headed, And still childish.  
  
That pretty much sums me up, right?  
  
Wrong.  
  
No one saw behind the mask of optimism, no one saw behind my fake bouncing of joy.  
  
Except one person, whom I am sure I'll never meet again.  
  
Tidus.  
  
He's the only person outside my family who knew that I wasn't all I seemed.  
  
Tidus knew that I wasn't just a blonde, bouncy, Al Bhed airhead by the name of Rikku.  
  
I was very much the opposite of that.  
  
Sure, I'm blonde, and I'm Al Bhed, but not bouncy and cheery all the time.  
  
Oh no.  
  
I just hid my fears and concerns under the mask.  
  
And I'm no airhead.  
  
I'm just not what everyone expects out of a blonde young lady.  
  
So I let them think that. I let them think that I was just an idiot girl with a big heart.  
  
Oh, how wrong they were.  
  
But Tidus understood. He realized that I wasn't what I seemed.  
  
And he respected that.  
  
And he let me continue with my play of happiness.  
  
I don't know why he let me continue.  
  
I don't know why he understood.  
  
Yet he did.  
  
That was cool of him.  
  
Really cool of him.  
  
Maybe he realized that without the mask, he'd be the only one to bring hope to the group.  
  
But then again, maybe not.  
  
Who knows?  
  
Actually, what I want to know is why I'm still thinking of him now.  
  
Well, maybe not just me.  
  
Yuna has too, it's written all over her face.  
  
How predictable.  
  
Leading girl falls in love with leading boy.  
  
Leading boy seems to like her back.  
  
Then leading boy disappears, and leading girl is pathetically waiting for him to return, which he won't.  
  
Wait, how did the fact that Yuna misses Tidus turn into a love tragedy??  
  
Is this trying to tell me something?  
  
.  
  
Not likely.  
  
Oh, the baffling puzzles of the human mind.  
  
Anyway, that brings me back to Yuna.  
  
She is my cousin, and I love her dearly due to her naïve innocence and faith in her friends. And I know she was in love with Tidus.  
  
Oh yes.  
  
VERY much in love.  
  
Or is she?  
  
Sure, her and Tidus made a cute couple that everyone is jealous of. Perfect unity and happiness galore.  
  
Nothing's perfect though.  
  
Look at it this way. Yuna is a tad naïve and doesn't have much experience outside of summoning and the like. What if her affections for Tidus are only a crush?  
  
What if she finds someone else before, if ever, Tidus comes back?  
  
Or, worse yet, what if she forgets about him completely?  
  
Or, at its worst, what if Tidus comes back, hooks up with Yuna again and Yuna finds someone else?  
  
Yuna wouldn't know how to let Tidus down. She's WAY too nice for that.  
  
And Tidus isn't hopeless. He'd eventually figure it out and she would have to let him go.  
  
Tidus couldn't take that.  
  
He had his father be a nasty jerk to him before, lived through the twists and turns of a reality that isn't even his.  
  
And, finally returning to this world and still confused about himself and reality, he gets dumped by Yuna. Then disaster would reign on him, and he'll become a bitter man that lives alone in the woods.  
  
Or I could just be over-reacting.  
  
Probably.  
  
Wait, why am I so concerned about him in the first place?  
  
Maybe I feel sorry for him.  
  
Perhaps so. Perhaps so.  
  
Maybe its because he understood me the best.  
  
But there are other things I don't understand.  
  
Like why he waited for me at the Thunder Plains.  
  
Or why he even bothered talking to me and seeing if I'm alright before he flirted with Yuna.  
  
Or why he bought me into battle and gave me enhancements and protections including potions first. Unless I wasn't injured, that is.  
  
WHY?  
  
.  
  
Oh well. I'll never know now.  
  
"RIKKU! Rinno ib! Dra aheha ec tufh ykyeh! E haat ramb!"  
  
I jump up, slipping on my fake mask for the walk down to the engine room.  
  
"E's lusehk!"  
  
~~~~~Okay, that was pretty angsty compared to what I thought it would be. Oh well. What do you think? Please, REVIEW!!~~~~~  
  
--- Translations:---  
  
"RIKKU! Rinno ib! Dra aheha ec tufh ykyeh! E haat ramb!" ~Rikku! Hurry up! The engine is down again! I need help!"  
  
"E's lusehk!" ~I'm coming! 


	2. Wishes

**_Wishes_**

Rikku sees Yuna's pain after the game… (Currently one-shot, yes, another) Y/R

Romance/Angst

PG

AN: I felt bad for my reviewers, but I couldn't think of a way to bring back Tidus without making the story burn with things that couldn't possibly happen. So I have another sad one-shot. No Yuna bashing, though. I know, you're all so sad... XD

_**Wishes:**_

Everyday you bring hope to the people of the world. You give everyone a bright smile, a grin that instantly brightens someone's gloomy day. You saved all of Spira, a savior to all humanity. 

And to them, you always will.

I know that, in order to save Spira, you needed to be a summoner.

And to be that, you must sacrifice yourself to bring life to Spira.

You bring so much hope and joy to Spira, Yuna.

But what brings hope and joy to _you_?

You claim that seeing other people happy brings joy, but I see it right through you. I watch you stare out at the ocean with a wistful air. I witness the fake smiles of happiness you deliver to Spirans on a daily basis. I can still recall the dark look that passes your face when the media speaks of _him_.

The team is worried about you. We all wish that we could do something.

**_I _**wish that I could do something. I wish you weren't like this.

But there are a lot of things I wished never happened.

So many things… I wished they never happened, but like all things, they did.

I wished Sin didn't exist, but he did.

I wished Yevon priests weren't cruel liars, but they were.

I wished Seymour was never born, but he was.

I wished I never found Tidus when he came aboard the Al Bhed ship, but I did.

I wished you never became a summoner, but you did.

I wished Lulu didn't retreat into herself when Chappu died, but she did.

I wished Chappu was still alive, but he isn't.

I wished Wakka told his feelings to Lulu, but he didn't.

I wished Wakka didn't hate the Al Bhed so much, but he did.

I wished I never joined your group, but I did.

I wished fiends didn't exist, but they did.

I wished Seymour wasn't a bad guy, but he was.

I wished the Guado weren't so abused, but they were.

I wished the Ronso's at Mt. Gagazet weren't slaughtered, but they were.

I wished Auron wasn't unsent, but he was.

I wished we never had to send him, but we did.

I wished Mi'hen Operation never happened, but it did.

I wished we never found out about the Fayth, but we did.

I wished we never knew that Tidus isn't real, but we did.

I wished we didn't have to kill Seymour, but we did.

I wished we never had to kill Jecht, but we did.

I wished Yevon didn't need to die, but he did.

I wished we never had to kill the Aeons, but we did.

I wished Tidus didn't disappear, but he did.

I wished you never loved him, but you did.

But, eventually, in the end, you realize that's all they are:

Wishes.

Just wishes. And if things never happened, we'd never met each other, Lulu would never return Wakka's feelings, Auron wouldn't have gotten his rest,_he_ would be living a lie, and there wouldn't be as much good in the world.

But there is still one thing that I wish never happened, despite the fact that it's just a wish…

I wish I never fell for him too…

But the fact still remains: **Wishes are wishes, and nothing more**.

_--Read and Review, please! It makes this kooky writer happy! And yes, Tidus was him. - --_


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